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Two people in deep conversation
I have the great fortune to be able to talk to The Most Important Person in the World every day. Who might it be? Some amazing philanthropist? A powerful politician? The most important person in the world is… whomever I am speaking to at the time!
A valuable lesson I learned a long time ago is that people love talking… especially about themselves. I realized something though, if everyone loves talking about themselves, then who listens? I started eavesdropping on some conversations and always noticed one thing most conversations were people who were battling with each other on who would get to talk more. They would interrupt, tune out, and start formulating what they would say as soon as the other person stopped talking.
So I started listening. I listened to the stories, the complaints, the hopes and dreams, the stresses of work, I just sat there listening using the SOFTENER technique. I listened like I was listening to the most important person in the world talking. I even listened for 2 hours while on a plane where the only thing I said was, “How are you today?” A funny thing started happening though, people started to compliment me on how fascinating I was, how I had the most interesting views on life, and how much they enjoyed conversing with me, even though I would hardly say a few word.
I started attracting people into my life. At parties people would ask me if I was “the one that everyone says listens.” This often led to a long walk and an emotional breakdown by the person. But the more I would listen, the more people would respect me and take to heart my desire to support them. I started sharing lessons that I had learned from all of the books, audio CDs, and seminars I went to. I started asking what they wanted out of life, and where they would be in 5 years if they stayed on their current paths.
By treating people like they are the most important person in the world, you will be amazed at how valuable you will become in people’s lives.